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Journalista. TV addict. Hip-hop head. Shoe enthusiast. Animal lover. Writer. Blogger. Coffee-holic. Twit. Alias: Mommy. #binders

551 Following   336 Followers   713 Tweets

Join Twitter 1/20/09

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Snow is so beautiful! ❤️#winter #newenglandwinter #snowinslomo http://t.co/wRUByOlKLB
1/24
2015
Shakespeare insult of the day. #insults #Shakespeare #calendar http://t.co/A4mKW7ryxk
1/23
2015
How a Dance Video Saved My Mashed Potatoes http://t.co/r2St7LoX4pPatriots fans so defensive about deflategate. Pats are better team but if true, why do they have to push the boundaries of the rules?
Retweeted by Maisy's Rumpus
1/21
2015
What a game! Way to go, Seahawks. That was a phenomenal way to earn your way to the Super Bowl. #WashingtonproudGet it together, Seahawks!Super fun girls weekend with my daughter continues with preschool pedicure. Found this awesome,… http://t.co/YSieKHe7UX2yo: Mommy, I have something for you! Me: Can't wait to see! Where did you get it? 2yo: From my NOSE! #8amboogersurpriseAnyone who thinks weed smokers are lazy ought to check out the Instagram of @SnoopDogg That dude stays posting pics 24/7.
1/18
2015
"I make love AND I make eggs." #WhitneyMovie
1/17
2015
I Love My Subaru: A Haiku http://t.co/9F5cxRU87k
1/15
2015
Coughing is awesome! #winterplague #nyquilshootersI love using @waze for driving directions and whatnot, but they really need a place to report asshole drivers on the road.
1/14
2015
Chali 2na makes any song 100x better. Probably my favorite voice in #hip-hop. #randomthoughts
1/13
2015
@mscholesyoung haha! She's a keeper simply because she didn't ridicule me (to my face, anyway).On Saturday, I texted our grocery list to our babysitter instead of my husband. http://t.co/vqVxlen6E0
1/12
2015
10 Things That Are Less Loud Than My Kids http://t.co/fYyOtLEUoJMy tots have been sweetly playing together for 45 minutes. Not one skirmish. Just had to document this moment for all of eternity.Kids, this is how we texted in the 80s. http://t.co/sJ5kf9Elzb
Retweeted by Maisy's Rumpus
1/10
2015
Sitting in the Target parking lot so that we can finish hearing "Let it Go" for the two millionth time. #parenting #frozenProject De-Troll-ify is in Progress http://t.co/PLVCu4XE0n
1/9
2015
Frozen Tears and Happiness http://t.co/Mao08EDZd2
1/8
2015
My big girl started #preschool today. Sniff, sniff. She didn't cry when we left, but I sobbed in the parking lot. http://t.co/NgTlLlvjRe
1/6
2015
What's the over/under on this drunk woman blowing chunks during the rose ceremony? #TheBachelorThis is so embarrassing. #TheBachelorOMG. Is there anyone who actually watches this show for alleged romance, or are we all just here to laugh together? #TheBachelorMean girls, unleash! #TheBachelorThe guidance counselor is the only person ever to be on #thebachelor without seven pounds of hair extensions.Because I love to torture myself, I'm going to watch another season of #thebachelor.
1/5
2015
Just made this pot of fresh veggie soup with the help of my son. Whether he will help eat it is another story. http://t.co/ijkWnTd5gs
1/2
2014
Seeing Myself Through My Son's Eyes... And Markers http://t.co/ojmfuz65cw
12/27
2014
Merry, merry. Peace and joy. #christmas http://t.co/s2LHNJbMVUMerry Christmas! http://t.co/gg5dJ0pyLN
12/25
2014
The boy is sick as a dog. He didn't even come downstairs to find the stupid Elf. #christmasplague
12/23
2014
It All Comes to a Screeching Halt http://t.co/aamBDx5ZEq
12/22
2014
Roughly 80 percent of my meals consist of things my kids don't finish eating. #parentingIt's 37 degrees. I've seen two people in shorts today. #newenglandwinter
12/18
2014
A Dee-gusting Christmas video you can't unsee. http://t.co/tCAHWXaT6E via @Maisy_F
12/17
2014
"That was something I can never unsee." http://t.co/tCAHWXaT6E
12/16
2014
@ViewsOnShoes Thanks so much for reading and sharing! It was fun to report and write! 👠
12/15
2014
My official announcement: I should not be the person cooking the meat in this family. Might be a take out night. Sorry, honey.Throw the Party of the Year http://t.co/VGhPeydmVcParty Time! How to fill your home with holiday cheer http://t.co/vYpDxEuOTA via @usaweekend
12/14
2014
Christmas mix playing. We just went from the Chipmunks "White Christmas" to "Christmas in Hollis" by Run DMC. Saturday morning jams.
12/13
2014
Friday Night Lights http://t.co/WC7I1hPEf7Lunch date with my 2 yo daughter. Dance party ensuing at Qdoba. She will break it down anywhere.
12/12
2014
What the Elf is wrong with people? http://t.co/rV2iT1zSgbPlaying tug of war with my blind dog. It's all fun and games until she tries to readjust her grip on the toy. #hellokittybandaids
12/11
2014
Saying Goodbye to a Great Show http://t.co/PvRdG3E3I9Big storm. Lights flickering. If I lose power the night of @SonsofAnarchy series finale, I'm gonna go Gemma Teller on someone. #FinalRideHaving a love/hate relationship with #SOAFX right now. Stoked to see the series finale, but not ready for it to end. #FinalRideSeriously, this day. Plumber has already been this morning, and we need the roofer here, like, yesterday. #toomuchwet"Tiny likes to be naked" and other awesome things about my daughter. http://t.co/JH68PqMZ77
12/9
2014
The very best part of my day is the point at which I get to stop listening to the Frozen soundtrack. #yaybedtimeKicking some ass at Candyland. That ought to earn me some respect around here. Or everyone will erupt into tears in about 3 min.If you're ever looking for a pick-me-up, don't read comments sections on current events stories. Man there are some hateful ppl out there.
12/8
2014
Not sure what to do without @WalkingDead_AMC tonight. Guess I'll have to, like, read a book or something. #withdrawalsMy story on women who love #shoes on the cover of @usaweekend today. Isn't this photo awesome?! http://t.co/3VwwKfFyXx
12/7
2014
My story: What's behind shoe obsessions? http://t.co/NG8BQYpqy4 via @usaweekendWhy do women love shoes so much? Shoe lovers, unite! http://t.co/49jF0YrdEU
12/6
2014
Mall playground = a real life Lord of the Flies.
12/3
2014
Since Thanksgiving, it has snowed enough to build a snowman, then it was 60 degrees, now it's snowing again. #newenglandCountdown is on to @SonsofAnarchy! Can't wait.I do more squats retrieving things for my young kids during mealtimes than I ever have at the gym. Trip No. 23 in progress. Yes, I counted.
12/2
2014
My shadow surprise made me forget I was freezing my arse off. http://t.co/sCYyzAG4yc
11/29
2014
EOTW: Boobies For Christmas http://t.co/g3hlSb2nHd
11/28
2014
Stomach explosion.So much to be thankful for, not the least of which is that this year, my son can put on his snow clothes without assistance. #milestone
11/27
2014
Rhyming the names of Frozen characters is all fun & games until the preschooler screams out "Pistoff!"
11/26
2014
Bats Aren't the Only Ones Who Can Sleep Upside Down. Archie Warren Draper: Loads of Personality, Even When Sleeping http://t.co/kdCc8UlTGVA frog using a leaf as an umbrella http://t.co/jVVCmeXzIY
Retweeted by Maisy's RumpusView from my front yard. Thanks for this treat, Mother Nature. #sunset #newengland http://t.co/kPK2lzngtGThank you for the memories, Shel Silverstein. http://t.co/ppn5epe7Q5
11/25
2014
My 22-year-old self would ridicule my calendar. Luckily, she's an old lady now. http://t.co/yKANuBFj3K
11/24
2014
"Kids, will you please eat your dinner?" Repeat 400 times. Then multiply that by 3. Then just give up and drink.Gorgeous day. No coats! Can't believe it's end of November in New England. http://t.co/DL5Wh0d8s7
11/23
2014
Some people have a tiara, but no such luck for me this year. EOTW: A Birthday With Pantiliner on My Face http://t.co/SqD96kQZZP
11/21
2014
My kid just sprayed about a gallon of Febreze. My place smells like a whorehouse and my nostrils are on fire. #parentingproblemsKids wants Care Bears for Christmas. Makes me happy, nostalgic. But then I wonder: Do we really need even *more* stuffed toys in this house?
11/18
2014
My nose is fixed, work is getting done. I'll pay attention to my newest baby again next week. http://t.co/CvZgJ6cx02Torture = when you have an itch underneath a cast in the middle of the night. Wide awake. Ugh.
11/15
2014
Oh, Archie Warren Draper. I miss you so much, even if you did roll in every dirt pile you ever saw.… http://t.co/VcERegSZgK
11/13
2014
Archie Warren Draper: The Dog With a Thousand Nicknames http://t.co/sZq3xduhCR
11/10
2014
We are about to make real popcorn on the stove, and I'm hopeful the fire dept will not be called in.
11/9
2014
The fact that dogs will still go outside to pee when it is frigid is amazing to me. They really don't get enough credit for that.My 2yo just realized she could scream into her Dora microphone. Because the blood curdling shrieks are not loud enough on their own.Mid-afternoon dog cuddles. The best.EOTW: Flatulence at Whole Foods http://t.co/GKPj57tYsK
11/7
2014
How Can You Tell If Your Nose Is Broken? http://t.co/b1w4mT39nyMe: Kids, I'm going to the restroom. Be right back. Toddler: Can I sit on your lap? Me: No thanks. T: Can I sit on your shoulders?Just reintroduced myself to working out with a balance ball. I expect to be completely sore and immobile in about 12-24 hours.
11/5
2014
Also, why does he keep saying "live television?" We can tell, dude. Nobody would air this if it were taped. #AnarchyAfterwordIs this the most awkward interview ever, or what? #anarchyafterword
11/4
2014
My son got a sticky eyeball in Halloween goody bag, which he threw at ceiling. It has been staring at me for 2 hrs. http://t.co/CzP56uCRwfProbably not the best idea to have the Desitin and Ben Gay next to each other in the medicine cabinet. #closecall #momproblemsAfter 1.5 hours at DMV, I am proud owner of another mediocre drivers license photo. Luckily, I don't get carded so much anymore bc I'm old."Standing Next to the Speakers at OzzFest." 10 Things That Are Less Loud Than My Kids http://t.co/Mj9J83TxZ4
11/3
2014
Extra hour of sleep is merely a fantasy for parents of tiny tots. 5:30? Nobody wants to see that on the clock.
11/2
2014
EOTW: My Tail, Literally and Figuratively http://t.co/xaA9KmahbfFall in New England Takes My Breath Away http://t.co/I31SoepjkJ
10/31
2014
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