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James Iry @jamesiry San Francisco, CA

Some people when faced with a problem think, I know, I'll use distributed computing. Now they have n^2 problems. I corral Cascading cats at Concurrent.

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Join Twitter 1/15/09

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No matter how much science I do up here, 73% of you will still think I'm finding farts.
Retweeted by James IryFarewell, Dr. Dobb's http://t.co/5kcBLtT3SW@scientist_lady @jeanqasaur A PhD is hot and all but what I really care about is are you cool?Any wikihow article on a sufficiently advanced topic is indistinguishable from trolling. http://t.co/leiZlxUMn0
Retweeted by James IryJust did it. http://t.co/NQAqrlo0kq
Retweeted by James IryThe American date format, created by me it was.
Retweeted by James IryDr. Dobbs is shutting down. I think this is officially the end the of the PC Revolution™.
Retweeted by James Iry#octothorpe #pound #number #hash #lumberyard #hashtag
@stephenjudkins @d6 We'll stuff 'em full of so many stock options they won't know what hit 'em.Do you think Santayana meant Bush v Clinton 2016?@fogus Roll a d20 to save vs uncaught exception.@d6 That for engineering to figure out. I'm more of an ideas guy.I've got a totally practical and useful solution for global warming: export it to Mars.You know who says waterboarding is torture? The United State Military Justice System http://t.co/wefuilsncq
@djspiewak Yeah. For me it's chemistry. Just cannot get into it.I am having trouble crossing this street. http://t.co/WLrjfiwdM9
Retweeted by James IryBit harsh that. http://t.co/sYyLUA3vxq
Retweeted by James Iry
Cellbacy is hereditary. If your parents never had sex chances are neither will you.With facial motion capture games are climbing up out of the uncanny valley. http://t.co/h5ZbDKqwii http://t.co/O6cMXRFsOf@campster Here ya go http://t.co/O6cMXRFsOfRussian Billionaire Who Bought James Watson’s Nobel Prize Medal Is Giving It Back to Him http://t.co/0eZseShLtQ via @slate
Retweeted by James Iry"Under the Clojure contrib guidelines, this project cannot accept pull requests...patches must be submitted via JIRA" http://t.co/M2PIv90Dim
Retweeted by James IryBook idea: "The War on Christmas." Elves get waterboarded, cluster bombs on toy workshop, drone strike on Santa. Somebody call Clancy.@qmaqdk Nope. Just elves. Santa gets a drone strike once the elves tell us what they know.@jamesiry Constantly playing Xmas songs might count… So they did it first.
Retweeted by James IryCan we use torture in the War on Christmas?@campster @shamusyoung "5 minutes" is only a small exaggeration. First prototype was 10 days. Sauce: http://t.co/HM2lpckaDM@campster @shamusyoung Oooh, I know that one: because it was cranked out in about 5 minutes in order to meet a marketing window.@shamusyoung @theescapistmag PROGRAMMING Y U SO HARD@fogus Don't worry. Nobody writes Pascal any more so you can't offend anybody.Godwin's Law. http://t.co/zZtrPu0P5R
Retweeted by James IryOn this day in 2004 Canada's Supreme Court ruled gay marriage constitutional and just 10 years later only 9 heterosexual couples remain.
Retweeted by James IryThere's clearly a balance between "octopus merges are fine" and "Christ, that's not an octopus, that's a Cthulhu merge”.—Linus Torvalds
Retweeted by James IryPosts generated by a Markov chain trained on the Puppet documentation and the assorted works of H. P. Lovecraft >> http://t.co/WIXZHexDme
Retweeted by James Iry
"you can't win the game. it exists only to destroy your mind." YUP http://t.co/Y99MaWHw56 http://t.co/QaYDze79aU
Retweeted by James IryHow to mess with your coworkers, from @d6 val WEEKS_IN_YEAR: Int = '4'@id_aa_carmack If so then @BoredElonMusk is set.“CONCLUSION: The internet is scary. Consider keeping private thoughts to yourself.” http://t.co/EviSeJa9bR
Retweeted by James Iry@russel_winder Yeah, but they aren't breaking the language or standard API. More like directory layout and such.Heads up, JDK 9 goin' break some shit http://t.co/16Kszyo5dXIt's not that I'm opposed to fusion food. It's that I think we haven't looked hard enough at ways to make fission food safe."Multithreaded programming - theory and practice." // via http://t.co/HgmgZ2vuly http://t.co/R2wQC5ITYh
Retweeted by James IryThe more I use Python for non-toy programs, the more I feel like Guido is trolling me.
Retweeted by James Iry
@runarorama @rit @larsr_h @milessabin So…now you're going to say "trust your feelings"?Honey, here's my plan for remodeling the kitchen: https://t.co/RkQMcChgdH
Retweeted by James Iry@raganwald If you don't you're humane.Looks like somebody is trying to deal with my main problems re: GitHub pull requests https://t.co/gNsBIA6PECBART rarely fails but when it does it fails hard.
Bond: Wait, aren't you going to confess your secret plan before killing me? Hawking: Nope. Toss him in the black hole lads. [Fade to black]Stephen Hawking says he'd make the 'ideal' Bond villain... http://t.co/3cq2t7JvDC
Retweeted by James Iry@djspiewak 30k feet is only about 5 1/2 miles from the ground. Cell radio towers can reach much further than that.@sethtisue Your character name can be Mayor Polimorfismo TipoWhy science teachers aren't given playground duty. http://t.co/qs1hOGY15T
Retweeted by James Iry
@CompSciFact The point is that if your point floats too much, then your floats become pointless.
Retweeted by James Iry@jamesiry Modern research methodology. Get link to paper. Find it's behind paywall. Imagine giving author middle finger. Move to next paper.
Retweeted by James IryI am "Insert Disk with \http://t.co/qnVbaH8cVK on Drive A: and strike any key when ready" years old.
Retweeted by James Iry@littlecalculist I almost "well actually'ed" you ironically but then didn't because Poe's Law.Modern research methodology. Get link to paper. Find it's behind paywall. Google for title. Find paper on university site. Read.Daughter asked me "which is faster, hot or cold?" Was about to explain temperature when she said "hot, because you can catch cold, hahaha."@jorgeo Also, according to your scale's Facebook posting you had a, um, hearty Thanksgiving.
"Robots No Longer Considered Harmful" by some … noteworthy authors: http://t.co/yGHvLGCo2z (via @ShriramKMurthi)
Retweeted by James Iry
@robey @viktorklang that font makes me long for the quiet elegance of Comic SansTraditional Thanksgiving songs. Here comes fat turkey, right down roasting pan lane. Oh cranberry sauce. Have a holly jolly stomach ache.@marius I'm pretty sure all the scrolling and blinking are commandments from Satan.Spice up your Thanksgiving with a Cthurkey http://t.co/QwcRIkgO3rfun example of the kind of bug that happens at facebook's scale: https://t.co/TZRKhUnqop
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@jamesiry Too good to be true… http://t.co/FedCjx7UNs http://t.co/yWIj4Dn2ha
Retweeted by James IryLate 1960s, Economy Class Seating on a Pan-Am 747 http://t.co/evhvXCnwVY
Retweeted by James Iry@built Be brave in your branding: let Godwin be your copilot.AT&T U-Verse VAP2500: The Passwords, They Do Nothing! http://t.co/0dhCcGGBLZ
Retweeted by James Iry@laurencetratt My understanding is CLOCK_MONOTONIC is always monotonically increasing, it just may change frequency.I know the difference between "repeatable read", "read committed", and "snapshot isolation." Or thought I did until http://t.co/p7O6QBHBtNDo you really know what guarantees transactions provide? Hermitage: Testing the "I" in ACID http://t.co/bkrf4LuhTN cc @pbailis @aphyr
Retweeted by James Iry@jamesiry On a related note: Q: What's the best anagram of "Banach-Tarski"? A: "Banach-Tarski Banach-Tarski"
Retweeted by James Iry
I thought Banach-Tarski was bullshit until I tried to put something back into its original box.cron-ically impossible to remember scheduling syntax.Less is more…more or less.@msimoni Wait…we're hating algebraic structures now? I'm going to hate semi-groups today.
[phone rings]"Hi! I bought a laptop for $500 and it came with so much free software!" "Oh. Mom, I don't think I'm coming home for Christmas"
@rit "Quantity has a quality all its own"Not allowed in the gym any more because I dropped a cheeseburger on the elliptical. Manager wouldn't even listen to how I saved the fries.ESPN gives Keith Law a Twitter suspension for defending evolution to Curt Schilling: http://t.co/otZtvhj4zz
Retweeted by James IryFund my working class ride share. I call it The Prolechariot.
Retweeted by James Iry"Are you now or have you ever been an Agilist?" "Senator, I must plead my fifth…" "It's a simple question." "Under advice of my attorney…"Which way the toilet paper should roll is the emacs vs vi of married life.@campster LudoSJW, plzI know how to make an Instagram: just add one cubic centimeter of water.@samth Haha, poor @raganwald . Writing for a nerd audience is hard.“Lisp did it first and better.” “Smalltalk did it first and better.” I’m going to troll folks by referring to them as “Betamax Languages.”
Retweeted by James Iry@raganwald It's a problem that programming creates, not OOP: too many symbols for our puny primate brains to keep track of and spell right.@raganwald I know. I used VisualAge for Java back in the day and the STers frequently told me how much it sucked compared to VA for ST.@raganwald I think I'm more arguing with the "solving a problem it creates" statement.@raganwald WAT. Autocomplete was first done in Smalltalk environments. So static types are neither the problem nor only solution.This new directory structure will restore your faith in humanity! #buzzfeedcommitlogs
Retweeted by James Iry10 code style fails that will keep you laughing! #buzzfeedcommitlogsThe botched merge that will tug at your heart strings! #buzzfeedcommitlogsTwo different styles of indentation met for the first time in this codebase. What happened next is inspiring. #buzzfeedcommitlogs
Retweeted by James IryA programmer finds a secret to fixing a failing test! #buzzfeedcommitlogs12 refactorings that will blow your mind! #buzzfeedcommitlogsThere was a race condition in user account updates. You won't believe what happened next! #buzzfeedcommitlogs
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